Negative days...

Before I even get started, I know. I KNOW. I have so many things to be thankful for and I AM thankful for so many things. I'm healthy, have a roof over my head (that I own, free and clear), a good husband, wonderful kids and grand kids, food to eat, clothes to wear, and the list just goes on and on and on.
BUT!!!!!
Some mornings. Some days. Some moments.
I truly hate my life!
Not the people. Sometimes they aggravate me, but I never hate them...well, except for those four or five that I walked away from.
The things I hate are, well, the THINGS!
The bills, the problems, the annoyances, the dirt, the clutter, the lack of funds, the unfinished projects, the unfulfilled dreams, the knowledge that I will never have some of the material things I have wanted my whole life. 
Pretty shallow, Eh?
Yeah. So what. Sometimes we're all entitled to be a little human, even those of us who aren't driven by keeping up with the 'Tarkington Prairie Johnsons' and/or the 'Holier & Better Than Thou' extended members of our family. 
Sometimes it's okay to wake up and be human...and to just want to kick the cat, throw a wrench, slam a door and cuss the dog! Doesn't mean it's probably the RIGHT thing to do, but it is perfectly human and perfectly normal to sometimes WANT to expend a little frustration and say, "Sometimes this crap really PISSES ME OFF!"
And to hell with those super analytical people who question our angst and try to find some deep emotional issue that has led us to remove the mask that tells the world, 'We are GREAT! Everything is FINE! Life is PERFECT! It's ALL good!'
Life is life. Some days it's good and some days it SUCKS. EVERYONE has these days, though few will admit to it.
I am reminded that I don't have cancer, my house isn't up for repossession, my husband hasn't left me, I am not starving...when I bitch about the snake that bit my dog, the scorpions I find in my kitchen, the spider that watched me shower, being in the middle of nowhere without a vehicle...And while I am so very thankful that I don't have cancer, my house is mine, my husband still loves me (God bless that man!) and my freezer is full, I am human and I HATE snakes, and scorpions and spiders and the fact that out here it's pretty darned scary to be without a dependable ride!
So I sit here this morning and admit that I am tired. I am VERY tired of the crap. All of it. Every little bitty piece of it. 
I am tired of having to fight and raise hell to get anything done. I am tired of 2-faced people and back-biters, lazy moronic politicians, the communistic IRS, the idiots that control our schools, the hateful racism in our country. I am tired of family feuds and lines being drawn in the sand. I am tired of the little aggravations, the little annoyances and upheavals of life. 
I am just tired of everything being so damned hard and I am tired of some things getting worse instead of better, robbing me of hope and damaging my faith.
So, yeah. I woke up this morning and I am supposed to be thankful. I am, a little. 
I just wish I knew what I'm supposed to do next and if some things will ever change for the better because at this point, the light at the end of the tunnel is growing dimmer by the day!