Some days...

Some days...
some things just seem too hard.
Some days...
I wonder why I am even here,
on this earth,
living this life.
Some days...
I just want to throw in the towel and say to hell with it all.
Some days...
I wish my memory was bad...
I think that for some of us carrying around memories that will not be silent, 
wounds that never quiet heal,
scars that are ugly and tender...
Loss of memory would be a blessing.

People are cruel.
They follow you around like a pack of ravenous wolves;
waiting for any sign of weakness
to give them an excuse to pounce on you,
rip your heart out,
leave you dying 
while they shout with joy at your demise.
People never care...
why you are what you are,
why you do the things that you do,
feel the things that you feel.
People don't care...
that you lash out in self defense and self preservation
as you struggle to breath,
struggle to keep your heart beating,
struggle to live.
People...
see you hurting, 
inflict more wounds onto you...
they rejoice in their blood-letting,
celebrate 
what they 
hope is
your last dying breath.

Some days...
It's just hard to find the will to keep going...
I didn't say I wouldn't or couldn't.
I am just sayng
that some days
it's really hard.